Shawn’s Chapter

July 7, 2010 By 31 Comments

 

It has been a gut-wrenching week for our family.  My cousin, just 37 years of age, had his third heart attack in three months.  His life is hanging in the balance as we anticipate open heart surgery this week.  His condition is serious, and we do not know the outcome.  Selfishly, perhaps, we pray he will be with us for a good long time, but we just do not know. 

 

What impressed upon my heart when he and I spoke was his clear perspective on life and what matters most.  You won’t hear someone in his position talking about how much money they made or what kind of cars they have driven.  If you listen closely to the things they talk about, they will tell you, without exception, that what really matters are RELATIONSHIPS.

 

 

1.    Relationship with God

 

  

 

None of us would dare get on a plane without knowing its destination, yet we will bounce through life with little thought as to where we are going.  This is the most important question you will ever have to answer:  “Where is your final destination?”  Knowing this one thing will give you greater comfort than anything else.  It also provides a navigation map for a more meaningful life.

 

  

 

2.     Relationship with Self

 

 

 

This is the “I” generation – it’s all about what “I” want.  We even name our gadgets with an “i” – and admittedly, I have my share of “iGadgets”.  But the irony of having the right relationship with ourselves is that it is really NOT about us.  It’s about figuring out our purpose and passion in life in order to fulfill our part in the story of mankind.  Gary Barkalow has an excellent series about finding your calling.  He says, “There’s an epic story we’re living in.”   

 

 

When people face life in clear perspective, they will talk of their true passion.  You will hear them reveal that “one thing” they were created to do.  They will speak in terms of being glad they had done it; or in terms of regret that they had not.  But at that point in life, they will know what “it” is.  It behooves all of us to search for our God-given passion and to live it as our story unfolds.  It is His gift to us that we must find and give to the world.   

 

 

Peace comes when our God-given passion is applied to purpose.

 

 

Have you ever done something and become lost in the moment?  Maybe it’s an activity or something you’ve created, but it felt like in that moment, you were “connected” with a deep part of yourself and working hand-in-hand with God.  Did you feel an incredible sense of peace?  THAT is your passion.  THAT is the relationship you must develop with yourself, because THAT is your unique connection to God and others. 

  

 

Is there something you are supposed to do?  An adventure you are to take?  A book or a song you are to write?  A painting you are to paint?  A speech you are to give?  A lesson you are to teach? If it is right, and you are compelled to follow a path, don’t ignore it.  You have no idea where it may lead.

 

 

We each have a chapter in this book of mankind that is uniquely ours to write.  Maybe it’s not a major part; but if we don’t write it, it will not be written.

 

 

 

3.    Relationships with Others

 

 

 

If we were to rewind our lives and only play the highlights, I guarantee we would focus on our relationships with others.  Those are our greatest treasures on this earth.  In fact, if you think about it, almost everything we do is about those relationships.  It’s not about the job, the house cleaning, the meal preparation – at their respective core, those things are really about nurturing relationships. 

 

 

When all is said and done,
there is something in us that finds peace in knowing
we have made a difference in someone’s life. 

 

 

For some people, this influence is with thousands; for others, perhaps, it is with just one person.  If that is your chapter, it is just as important to write as the other, because you never know what that one person’s chapter will look like because of you.

 

 

 

Amazing things would happen if those of us living outside the boundaries of ICU looked at life with the incredible perspective of those on the inside. 

 

 

Shawn, I don’t know what this week holds, but I do know one thing: either way, your heart gets fixed.  You have written an important chapter to your world, perhaps just the beginning.  And we are blessed because you have.

Filed Under: Relationships, Spirit Tagged With: , , ,

Life Changers – Part 3

June 20, 2010 By 3 Comments

It seems everyone has a defining era in his life.  My grandfather’s was the Great Depression. Pop was born and raised in those most difficult of times, and they profoundly influenced who he has become and how he has lived.  There are times you never forget – and those were his.

 

They made him a hard worker.  In his eighties now, he is still the hardest working person I know.  Every year, he plants a garden big enough to feed a whole community.  He is tough, as tough as they come, and we all know that.  He is determined and decisive.  He has high standards and little patience for those who don’t.  Pop will tell you what he thinks whether you want to hear it or not.  “I’ll tell you one thing” is his adage, and he will tell you many things.  But you can be assured that what he has to say is definitely worth hearing.

Pop received very little formal education but was well educated in what he calls the “School of Hard Knocks”.  His degree is in the school of life, and from that, he has graduated with honors.  He has an amazing penchant for common sense and an innate ability to understand and apply even the most complex of processes and talk intelligently about them.  Yes, he will tell you he is uneducated.  But I will tell you he is the smartest man I know.  There is education, and there is wisdom.  He has wisdom.

Pop is a teacher.  He teaches by example.  But he teaches in a bigger way than he may even realize.  You see, I listen very closely to the lessons he has to teach.  I observe him as an example in life.  But it is not because he demands it.  It is because, through the years, he has “been there”.  It is because he has won my heart and my trust.

When I was six years old, I remember coming home from school feeling very sick.  By the time I got off the bus, I was shivering from a very high fever.  My grandmother was in the kitchen making dinner, and Pop was on the couch resting after a hard day of work.  He said, “Come lay on the couch by Pop-Pop and cover up so you’ll get warm.”  The next thing I knew, I was on the way home from the hospital.  I had had a seizure.  What a comforting thought that has always been, that when I was sick – Pop was there.  He was the strong one. 

I traveled frequently with my grandparents.  I always tease that Pop has gasoline in his veins, as he can’t stay in one place very long.  We always had fun going places and visiting with family and friends.  We went camping at the beach a lot.  I vividly remember drifting off to sleep at night – the smell of salt water, the reflection of the red and green lights from the bridge onto the water, the soothing sound of the water moving through the inlet toward the open ocean…and Pop’s snoring.  At the beach, in the mountains – Pop was there.  He was the adventurous one.

When I was a teenager, my parents divorced and times got really hard.  Pop became more like my dad than my grandfather at that point.  My first job was cleaning low-income apartments that were being rehabbed into high-end townhouses.  That was a nasty job…and difficult.  The good part was that I rode to work every day with Pop (he was on the construction crew), and we ate lunch together most days.  I usually didn’t bring much, but my grandmother always sent him good lunches.  I remember being unusually hungry one day, and he shared his egg sandwich with me.  Such a simple thing, but I remember.  Pop was there – he was the hard working man who gave me half his lunch.

When I graduated from high school, he was there.  When I graduated from college, he was there.  The day I got married, it was he who gave me away.  When life carried us hundreds of miles from our families, my grandparents would make the drive to visit us.  Throughout my life, he has always “been there”. 

And there was laughter.  Back in the 1980’s, “jams” were the “in” thing to wear for the younger crowd.  My sisters and cousins bought him a wild outfit for his birthday – as a joke.  He made us all laugh when he actually wore it.  Pop was there – he was a comedian, and he still makes us laugh.

On this Father’s Day, I want to flip the roles and tell him “one thing”:
Thanks, Pop, for “being there”.

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Life Changers-Part 1

May 31, 2010 By 8 Comments

 

Copy (2) of IMG_2586  

“You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.”

 

–Charles “Tremendous” Jones

 

Admittedly, it sounds a bit like a circus act.  You go to a camp in the mountains of Colorado, and you spend your weekend with a bunch of people you met on the internet:  a magician, an inventor, an artist, a sculptor, sales people, a bike racer, a guy who does bike tricks, a former truck driver, a former commercial pilot, a computer geek, business and career coaches, financial coaches, a mother of twelve with a catering business, owner of a barbecue restaurant, a building contractor, an ADD coach, a Fibromyalgia coach, and a college professor. 

What are you, nuts?

No, just a Free Agent Academy member.  Free Agents are a group of real people in pursuit of meaningful work.  These are amazingly creative and successful people with the common desire to use their God-given talents and skills to help others.  Real people…real success…real passion.

The “Pied Piper” of this group is Kevin Miller, son of author and career coach, Dan Miller.  Kevin has a passion for helping people achieve business success and has built a community just for them.  This was not your typical business conference.  The speakers (Free Agent Academy professors) are experts in their respective fields, and their presentations were very interesting and jam packed with helpful information.  The breakout sessions were insightful and helped each of us walk away with a three step action plan for our various businesses.  The professors were there for the small group sessions, for meals, for all of it – and available to answer our questions.  It was a great opportunity to get to know them and to see their genuine passion for the work that they do.

Each morning began with a walk to a nearby lake with a view of Pikes Peak.  What a way to start the day!  The view and the camaraderie of walking with fellow Free Agents were priceless.

If you asked these people what brought about the changes in their lives from where they were to the business owners they are today, they would undoubtedly trace it back to two people:  Dan Miller and Kevin Miller. 

A year ago, I was miserable.  I was exhausted and had lost my passion for work and life in general.  One day, I decided to do something I normally did not do – go to lunch.  I tuned in to the Dave Ramsey show on my car radio, and he was interviewing his good friend, Dan Miller.  Dan is author of the books 48 Days to the Work you Love and No More Mondays.  The titles intrigued me, so I read the books.  In fact, I read them twice.

Fast forward to today.  I am once again passionate about my work, have started my own business, lost twenty-five pounds, traveled to places I’ve never been before, met some amazing people, and even jumped out of an airplane.  Looking back, I am amazed at the changes in my life in just one year…and it all started with one person and his books.  That one person, Dan Miller, led me to another, Kevin Miller.  These two are “life changers”.

God has a way of placing in our paths the people and
the books we need at the time we need them. 
Whether or not we choose to meet those people
and read those books is up to us,
but amazing things happen when we do.

 

Have you read any interesting books recently or met any new people?  Is there some part of your life that needs changing for the better?  If the answer is yes, then prayerfully seek the resources you need to make that change.  Chances are it will be a person…or a book.  If that change involves work, check out 48 Days to the Work you Love, No More Mondays, and Free Agent Academy.

 

A year from now, where will YOU be?

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Photo by Tim Dunagan

 

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What’s at the End of YOUR Life Sentence?

May 30, 2010 By 2 Comments

Mama (my dear mother-in-law) died two years ago, less than a month after her birthday, of cancer.

As I thought of her, this saying came to mind.  I had written it in the back of my Bible years ago during a sermon by the late Dr. Lee Roberson.

You see, Mama was one of those rare people who, no matter what, lived with an exclamation point at the end of everything she did.  Whether it was family, friends, work, home, travel, art, writing, or animals; for her, it all ended with one big exclamation point.  She had an infectious zeal for life.

This led me to wonder, “What’s at the end of my life sentence?”

Would it be a question mark, as in, “Who was she?  What was she doing here?”  Or a period, as in, “She died.  End of story.”  Perhaps it would end with a comma, like an unfinished sentence; or a colon with important things left unsaid.

It behooves us all at this stage of life to ask ourselves this question:  “What’s at the end of my life sentence?”  And then to set out to live as Mama did, leaving happy exclamation points in the lives of those we love and at the end of everything we do.

Mama would not want us to remember how tragically she died but how wholeheartedly she LIVED!

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